Author Topic: Hey!~  (Read 132 times)

Offline Pamela

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 26
  • www.awtj.org
    • A Walk Toward Jesus
Hey!~
« on: December 31, 2011, 06:00:44 pm »
Just stopping by to say hello and to wish everyone a blessed New Year!

Blessings
Pamela
For more information on A Walk Toward Jesus please visit www.awtj.org

Social Buttons


Offline dgbygrace

  • Global Moderator
  • Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 509
Re: Hey!~
« Reply #1 on: December 31, 2011, 06:05:11 pm »
Blessed blessed New Year Pamela!  So good to hear from you!!  How is everything?
The only true work of art is a human soul,
all else is but a reflection

Offline cizz

  • Administrator
  • Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 626
Re: Hey!~
« Reply #2 on: December 31, 2011, 07:15:37 pm »
Blessed new year sister! So glad to hear from you Pamela!  Bighug

Offline Pamela

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 26
  • www.awtj.org
    • A Walk Toward Jesus
Re: Hey!~
« Reply #3 on: January 07, 2012, 11:15:19 pm »
It's been busy! We are in the middle of building polytunnels to make it easier for me to garden. We had built some cedar raised beds but nothing beats greenhouse gardening. We will actually be finished with them by tomorrow, and I am super excited...

Getting ready to have the community center insulated and sheetrocked. We had the AC duct ran and we are waiting for the AC man to complete hooking up the system, so that is good to go...

My aniexty disorder has kept me close to home for the past few months. Its hard for me to get out when it flares up pretty high. I dislike it so, but I have resolved to it being, "it is what it is."

Other than that, it's all been pretty grand...How's things been with y'all....
For more information on A Walk Toward Jesus please visit www.awtj.org

Offline cizz

  • Administrator
  • Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 626
Re: Hey!~
« Reply #4 on: January 08, 2012, 12:53:07 am »
Sister I didn't realize you suffered from anxiety disorder, bless your heart! I lived with anxiety most of my life, it wasn't until agoraphobia took root from my anxiety that I finally realized "anxiety" was not a normal state to be in every second of every day! My disorder developed at a very young age and really can't even remember a time in my childhood that I did not have it. I can fully understand what you mean by, "it is what it is." 

I remember stressing myself out so badly over knowing I was not acting and reacting in what people consider a normal way, that just added more anxiety to what I was already feeling. I still have it but not every second like I use to, I have learned to recognize most of the things that are triggers for me. Growing older I have also changed in respect to how my reactions are, use to I would react with a scared terrified feeling and display of behavior, now those reactions have turned into snapping ill mannered behaviors, I become very agitated at the first signs of it creeping up on me, the shortness of breath, back of neck burning! I usually have to excuse myself and retreat somewhere quiet and cool so I can regain myself..keep reminding myself it is not others causing me to have the anxiety! I think that is the change in my older age now, it went from me perceiving that something was wrong with me into now something is wrong with everyone else and that is causing me to react!  :blink: I can honestly say though that I never tried any of the meds they wanted me to, it seemed to me that was like putting a small bandaid on huge wound. Right now it is like I have healed the wounds but still have the scars to deal with ever now and then.

Offline Pamela

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 26
  • www.awtj.org
    • A Walk Toward Jesus
Re: Hey!~
« Reply #5 on: May 14, 2012, 04:45:10 pm »
Sister I didn't realize you suffered from anxiety disorder, bless your heart! I lived with anxiety most of my life, it wasn't until agoraphobia took root from my anxiety that I finally realized "anxiety" was not a normal state to be in every second of every day! My disorder developed at a very young age and really can't even remember a time in my childhood that I did not have it. I can fully understand what you mean by, "it is what it is." 

I remember stressing myself out so badly over knowing I was not acting and reacting in what people consider a normal way, that just added more anxiety to what I was already feeling. I still have it but not every second like I use to, I have learned to recognize most of the things that are triggers for me. Growing older I have also changed in respect to how my reactions are, use to I would react with a scared terrified feeling and display of behavior, now those reactions have turned into snapping ill mannered behaviors, I become very agitated at the first signs of it creeping up on me, the shortness of breath, back of neck burning! I usually have to excuse myself and retreat somewhere quiet and cool so I can regain myself..keep reminding myself it is not others causing me to have the anxiety! I think that is the change in my older age now, it went from me perceiving that something was wrong with me into now something is wrong with everyone else and that is causing me to react!  :blink: I can honestly say though that I never tried any of the meds they wanted me to, it seemed to me that was like putting a small bandaid on huge wound. Right now it is like I have healed the wounds but still have the scars to deal with ever now and then.

Yes, I started suffering with this disorder back in the 1989/1990 some where around there. I was sitting at work on day and bam! It hit me out of no where. It was really bad in the beginning, but I have learned to get around some of it. Each time I figure out a new way to get around it - it seems to creep up in a new way to get around my getting around it.

I have only one trigger point and it has been that way from the very beginning. It started with my boss at the time telling me he was heading to the restroom. Once I heard the door close, bam! it hit me. I can recall that day with a vivid recollection. It changed my life even up to this point. I went from being able to go any where at any time to quitting my job 2 weeks later and hiding from the world on my couch.

So today anytime I go some where I have to know where all the restrooms are if not, I have to send a scouting party, (my hubby) to find them before I will do anything. I have to know all the details about whether or not is there more than one, how far from the exit are they, etc. If I could get rid of those thoughts, the anxiety would vanish. I haven't a clue why it surfaced in that way. There is no reason for it other than the enemy using it, and creating it, to stop my feet from walking to where God wants me to go. Adding to the mix is when my back injury occured. Was not able to walk at one point and could not walk as fast as I used to after my surgery. Now I have arthritis setting in my right knee and it has slowed me down a little more. BUT!!!! God is a God of healing and I am hanging onto the promises HE has given to me!!!
For more information on A Walk Toward Jesus please visit www.awtj.org